The first three weeks

Being a parent to a newborn is crazy!  Forget any quality "me time" - unless you count sleeping as part of that category... and even then, you still don't get a lot of it!  I love being a mom and watching my son grow, but wow, is it a lot of work!  

First off, breastfeeding did not go well after the first few days.  Tyler seemed to be doing okay at the hospital and for the first night or two at home, but then it went downhill after that.  We would constantly "fight" with each other and feed off each other's frustrations.  He would detach and shove his hands in his mouth so then I would have to wrangle his arms down, which would further piss him off and then he wouldn't latch back on.  After a visit to the latch clinic, I learned how to do the football hold, which seemed to work better for us, but the fights didn't stop.  On top of that, I realized that I wasn't producing a lot of milk and that's one of the reasons Tyler would get so frustrated.  He would only get maybe one ounce of milk per feeding when he's supposed to get double that.  He wasn't back to his birth weight by his 2-week appointment, so the doctor suggested pumping my milk and to let her know what his weight was at the next latch clinic session, which was the following day.  I tried using an electric pump that afternoon and didn't think I was using it correctly because barely anything was coming out.  I brought the pump with me to the clinic so they could show me how to use it and the same thing happened.  They told me the pump was working but it was my milk supply that was low.  Also, his weight was 3 ounces less than it was at the doctor's office, which could be because of the difference in the scales used, but the fact that the weight was still low worried me.  I called the pediatrician's office and they recommended supplementing with formula.  We picked some up that afternoon (and returned the pump) and I was surprised at how fast he sucked down a bottle.. the little man was hungry!  I ended up buying a manual pump the next day because I felt very full in the morning and figured if I try pumping, maybe Tyler could get at least some milk per day and not only have formula in is diet.  I am able to get between 1.5 and 2 ounces during pumping and he drinks it the same day.  Any milk is good milk!

Second, I look forward to 8-9 months down the road when Tyler starts sleeping through the night.  I feel like even when I do sleep, it's not a deep sleep because I'm waiting to hear him start to squirm then cry.  I have noticed that he's been sleeping for slightly longer stretches of time now that he's getting enough food in his belly, so at least we have that going for us.  Everybody tells me to sleep when the baby sleeps during the day but I never seem to be sleepy tired when he's out.  I at least rest and try not to overdo it, which puts a lot on the hubs, who I will not have at my disposal starting Wednesday when he goes back to work (insert extremely sad face here :( )  I hope to be able to handle it on my own but already feel overwhelmed when I think about it.  Must start the deep breathing that helped me during labor to calm me down.

Third, I never thought I would be so concerned about another person's poop!  We waited for what seemed like forever for him to have his first one at home, then for it to change color, then for it to happen at all once we started him on the formula.  Just the other day I went to change his diaper and was greeted with what looked like avocado paste and shouted down to Kevin to Google it to make sure it was normal (turns out it's due to the iron in the formula and isn't anything to worry about.)  Seems we are now having one major poopy diaper a day but several peepee diapers, at least one after every feeding.  There are also plenty of fart moments throughout the day, some that make me ask Kevin, "Was that him or you?"

Fourth, as much as we would like to invest in sound silencing headphones, we know that at this age Tyler is actually crying for a reason versus just trying to get attention so we need to respond to him.  It's fascinating how he can go from 0 to Red Face in 0.5 seconds and it takes us much longer to figure out what he wants so he looks like a tomato by the time he gets food, a blanket or a clean diaper.  It has gotten easier to tell what he's "asking" for over the past week so he seems to be a happier baby.  He's even smiled a few times, and I don't care if it's due to gas, I still enjoy seeing it  :)

Fifth, I've learned to do a lot of thing one-handed, such as typing out this blog while the other arm is occupied with an extremely warm (and out cold) infant.  I can even make a bottle of formula for him, pour a cup of juice for me, and pet the cat (who is adjusting quite well to the new bald, screaming kitty) with one hand while holding the squirming football with the other.  I love that women are natural multi-taskers.

I must say that we're finally getting the hang of things and are getting used to running on limited sleep.  I honestly didn't realize how time-consuming a newborn is, but I wouldn't trade this for anything else in the world... even a winning lottery ticket.  Tyler is my Mega Millions  :)